Gender and Media

I watched two films on gender and media this evening with a group of homeschoolers. Generation M - Misogyny and Media Culture and Killing Us Softly (3).

If you get a chance to watch these, please also rent Disney's The Little Mermaid. As this justifies my position on Disney movies, I particularly enjoyed having this example shared by the host of the evening!

In short, the whole exercise demonstrated that the media is pervasive and powerful, and that power is used in ways that are harmful to women and other minorities. Media tells our girls that they are to be passive, silent, victims whose appearance is key and who must strive to attain an impossible image of beauty. Girls are expected to be sexually attractive and accommodating. In contrast, media tells our boys that they are to be aggressive and violent. Boys are expected to be sexually dominant and aggressive. When media does recognize other minorities, the images are generally unflattering.

Sadly, the influence of media is so pervasive that it actually creates a culture that is difficult to extract from the media influence. Ultimately, that's my concern. I feel pretty good about my ability to protect my children from negative media influences. (Yet, I will admit that I am not perfect. For example, they know far more about Disney princesses than I would ever wish them to, and even have some Disney princess as well as Barbie books and toys given to them as gifts by others.) However, there is no way to shield them from the world, which is molded by these media influences.

Culture dictates that my girls get positive reinforcement for acting girl-y. And so they do. Subtle gender biased messages abound, even from well-meaning, loving intentions on the part of others.

We have all heard of the researchers who find that people assign masculine characteristics to a baby dressed in blue and assign feminine characteristics to the same baby dressed in pink. I wonder how much of our children's gender identity and gender-based characteristics are based on their biological differences and how much is based on subtle cultural messages. I know people who believe that a lot is biological. But I have such a hard time swallowing this. I really think that we are blind to nuances and don't give babies and children enough credit for absorbing every single detail.

Me, included. I try really hard to emphasize the strength and intelligence of my children over their appearance. I work to expose them to a variety of activities and experiences. Yet, I am very comfortable giving in to their desires for pretty dresses and dolls. I don't hesitate to sign them up for dance classes and don't fight too hard when they don't want to participate in a sports class.

I also don't think that everyone appreciates how deep gender bias runs in our culture. Most don't have concrete examples. Yet I know people who have been hired for jobs because they are attractive. (I have been in the meetings where the fact was discussed openly.) I have received lower compensation than my equivalently performing male colleagues (even when I arguably deserved more for my unprecedented contributions to my firm's income by generating one of the firm's biggest clients). I have observed supervising lawyers joking with a woman associate about her breasts. Sadly, I even know women lawyers who will manipulatively cry in a meeting with their peers because they know that is the only way they can win an argument.

As a result, I want to prepare my kids for the world where they will sometimes find themselves in these untenable situations. There is simply no way to protect them from it entirely, much as I would like to do so.

For now though, I am going to stick to my position on Disney movies.