Home Made Girl

Conversation last night at a party:

Two little girls joking about babies coming from a store. One asked, what store I got Middle Sister from.

I said, “I didn’t get her from a store. I made her myself.”

They said, “We know she didn’t really come from a store, but what store would she have come from?”

I stayed the course. “She’s home made.”

One girl said, “She came from the hospital store!”

I said, “She was really home made. She was born at home.”

Big eyes. Pause.

I continue. “She was actually born in a hot tub!”

Eyes grow wider.

“Why was she born in a hot tub?!”

I explained, “That’s where I was when she was ready to come out. I had someone bring a hot tub to my bedroom, so she was born right there in a tub in my bedroom.”

“How could she breathe underwater?” they wanted to know.

“Since she was in water in the amniotic fluid in my belly, she didn’t try to breathe in the few second she was under water in the tub. She just waited to take a breath until she was out of the tub.”

Needless to say, the girls were very impressed.